Usually I write about how managers can best relate to their subordinates. But everyone has a boss and this month I’ve decided to turn the tables and share some ideas for having a positive relationship with a boss.

A wise person once told me, “The only thing worse than having a nervous and insecure boss is having a nervous and insecure boss and you are the one making him or her feel that way”. One of the best ways to have a positive relationship with a boss is having the attitude that your primary job is to make the boss look good and to keep the boss out of trouble. Many senior level executives have pretty big egos and one of the ways to get into trouble is to cause embarrassment to someone who has a big ego.

The best boss I ever had had an uncanny ability to remember and follow up on every assignment that he gave to those who worked for him. I quickly realized that the best thing I could do was to always deliver what I promised, slightly ahead of schedule if at all possible. We developed a great relationship because he knew he could always count on me to do what I promised. He spent a lot less time following up with me than he did with my peers who didn’t “get it”.

Along with this, I found that the best time to negotiate the due date for a project or assignment was when the assignment was given, and not when you realized that you weren’t going to be able to make the deadline. Once you have accepted an assignment from your boss and agreed to a deadline, then you should do all you can to meet that deadline. If the deadline is unreasonable or you need help with priorities, this should be discussed in the beginning. If you are making best faith efforts to complete the project on time, and unforeseen circumstances come up, then alert your boss immediately.

Too many subordinates just bring problems to their bosses. A way to build a positive relationship with a boss is to get in the habit of bringing solutions along with the problems. Often we know what should be done, but may be afraid to act without the boss’s approval. Most bosses will appreciate and value a subordinate who has thought through a problem and has come up with ideas on their own to solve it. It is a great way to build trust with the boss and to get him or her to give you more responsibility.

There is always a fine line between knowing when to agree and support a boss, and when to challenge or question. If we do one or the other all the time it is a problem. If we are always agreeing, then the boss will see us as weak and not contributing. On the other hand, if we challenge every decision or action, we can be seen as uncooperative and disruptive. One rule of thumb is to only challenge when you have alternatives that could be better solutions than the boss’. Be careful that you have the same facts and information before being critical or challenging.

Finally, we teach in customer service training that the best way to develop customers who become advocates for you is to do things that are unexpected and positive. The same is true for developing bosses who are your advocates and supporters. Find ways to do something extra, without being asked, that contribute to the boss’s success and make a positive difference in the organization.

If you role model these behaviors in your interaction with your boss, then maybe your subordinates will observe the behavior and do the same for you. Imagine if each person who reported to you did these things.

ryan scholz works with leaders whose success is dependent on getting commitment and high performance from others. he is author of turning potential into action: eight principles for creating a highly engaged work place. for more information, visit his web site at www.lead-strat-assoc.com.

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